Drabble Collection
by ViDez
Summary: Drabble 5: "Roy, this is Alphonse Elric. He'll be an on-field medic since he's quite skilled in Xingese alkahestry." A series of random prompts and ideas. Feel free to write about some of them.
1. Major Mustang

_This story will be a drabble collection of random ideas I've come up with._

_These drabbles are as complete as they're ever going to get, unless I say otherwise._

_Feel free to gain inspiration and explore these various ideas even further._

**_Drabble 1: Role Reversal_**

_In which Roy is the newest State Alchemist on the block, and he was assigned under Edward's (The Fullmetal Alchemist and youngest State Alchemist ever) command._

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><p>Major Mustang wondered if he could get away with killing his commanding officer.<p>

His bare fingers twitched reflexively to snap as the Colonel slammed another pile of paperwork on the desk in front of him. That smug grin threatening to split the younger alchemist's face made the major's dark eyes glint with something ferocious for a split second, before resuming its impassive look. Roy's ears picked up on Breda and Havoc snickering in the background and he let out an almost inaudible sigh.

"Colonel Elric," The newest State Alchemist muttered, refusing to call the blond 'sir'. "I also have paperwork of my own to do and I would very much like to complete it by the start of lunch." Roy's eyes glanced in a meaningful manner towards his co-workers across the table. "Lieutenants Breda and Havoc seem to be finished with their reports. Why don't you give this pile to them? I believe they also know how to forge your signature."

The two mischievous militants froze and flashed dark glares at Roy, who brushed them off with a casual flick of his wrist. Those glares didn't compare to Riza's.

Speaking of the Hawk's Eye, she was gazing at the young Colonel with a disapproving look on her face. Roy almost felt sorry for Colonel Elric - almost. The young militant, as did the rest of the men, had to be on their toes at all times when Hawkeye was around, and the Flame Alchemist just about flinched as the woman's fingers brushed the handle of her pistol.

Edward - _the little shit_ - just kept on grinning, ignoring the looming danger of possibly having a bullet hole in his ear. Either he had a death wish, or he was incredibly stupid; Roy chose the latter.

"Well, _Flame_." Edward drawled. "Think of this as payback for nearly burning my ass off while I was fending off Scar last week. I think that you deserve signing all these."

"...No, _Fullmetal_, I don't." Roy deadpanned as his eyes skimmed through the words of the top document. "Ninety percent of these property damages are _yours_. I don't mean to be rude, but how is it that you haven't been _fired_ yet?" He allowed himself to smirk as the Colonel growled. "No pun intended, of course."

Amber eyes flashed with a brief flicker of fury, "Careful, Major." Edward hissed, his gloved hand - his automail hand - twitching once. Roy had only seen a glimpse of his automail arm during the fight with Scar. "A person in passing might mistake that for insubordination."

Roy looked up to meet narrowed eyes, "A person in passing might not even notice you because of how _short_ you are, and wonder why I'm talking to myself."

"_I'M NOT SHORT, MAJOR BASTARD!"_

The Flame Alchemist mentally chalked himself a point. He took some sort of sadistic satisfaction on how the young Colonel reacted to people commenting on his lack of height. Elric was just so _fun_ to taunt, consequences be damned.

"Colonel Elric," Hawkeye let out a sigh. "Please continue with your documents. They're due to be handed in to the Fuhrer's office by 2PM sharp."

Edward made a move to protest, but the sharp glint of Hawkeye's sidearm in the light made the complaint die in his throat. _'Maybe Fullmetal isn't as idiotic as I thought,'_ Roy inwardly smirked.

"...Fine," Edward groused, but his grin was back at full force. "But I don't think I will make the deadline. I think I'm going to need help." He glanced meaningfully at Roy.

"Nice try, sir." The click of Riza's gun made the Fullmetal Alchemist bite back a yelp of fright. Grudgingly, Edward picked up the pile and stomped back to his desk, grumbling about 'slave-driving Lieutenants' and how 'Mustang set her up to this'.

Colonel Elric glanced back and gritted his teeth as his topaz orbs spotted the insufferable smirk playing at Major Mustang's lips.

'_Note to self: transmute the soles of Mustang's boots to the floor later on.'_


	2. GreEd

_Another random idea. Inspired by a prompt on the kinkmeme._

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**_SPOILERS FOR EPISODE 28 ONWARDS (Brotherhood)._**

**_Warning: Has excessive cussing at some points._**

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**_Drabble 2: Gre-ed_**

_Edward pushed Ling out of the way and accepted the Philosopher's Stone into his body instead._

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><p>'<em>GET OUTTA MY GODDAMN BODY!'<em>

Shut up.

'_Fuck you! I can be as loud as I want!'_

Shut. Up.

'_Ahhh goddammit! Get out! Get the hell out! I didn't want this - fuck!'_

...Does it look like I care? _You're_ the one that shoved your friend out of the way, _you're_ the genius that got yourself stabbed with the needle and accepted the Philosopher's Stone, and now you're stuck with _me_.

I allowed a grin to stretch across my face as I felt the absolute fury welling up from inside me.

'_It's not your face! Not your body! It's mine! _Mine!_'_

A chuckle escaped _my_ lips. "Yours, hm...?" I mused out loud. Thank god I'm all alone up here, or else people might start to stare. To them, it looked like I was talking to myself. "The way you just said it... you sounded so _possessive_."

Oh _yesss_. Possessive. _Possessions_. Property, belongings, material wealth... Lovely, very lovely.

'_Well, duh.'_ The voice continued, anger practically rolling off it in waves. _'I was born with this body, and you have no right to share it with me! Get. The. Fuck. __**Out.**__'_

"Hmm, lemme think about it." A mock-thoughtful expression was plastered on my face. "How about... no?"

A shrill scream coming from inside my head made me visibly cringe. Holy crap that kid had a set of lungs on him. I rubbed my ears, a scowl replacing the grin I had moments ago.

"Great; now my head hurts. Thanks."

'_Good.'_ My host snarled. _'You deserve it. Because of your damn Father I'm now separated from Al! Oh shit,'_ The voice suddenly sounded horrified. _'Oh no... Al! Oh shitshit_shit_, I bet he's panicking now because I'm not there, and-'_

I started tuning him out, but it was difficult to when there was hardly any outside noise around. My eyes gazed dully at the people walking around on ground level - huh, they looked like ants. I brought up my hand and pretended to pinch one of the puny humans into a pancake with my index and thumb.

'_-and Winry! Oh no, what if she finds out that her automail is busted and replaced with actual working human _limbs_?'_

"I thought you'd like that, pipsqueak." I commented, bringing two _flesh_ hands into my field of vision. I also kicked the now flesh left leg up in the air once before letting it fall back down again. "That's the upside of having a Philosopher's Stone injected into your bloodstream - you have no choice but to regenerate." I paused, "Of course, that has its downsides sometimes."

Father told me that Lust was burned to death by some guy called the Flame Alchemist - what was his name? Mastiff? Mustard? Whatever. Lust's Philosopher's Stone was drained by the constant regeneration her body did.

Whew; what a way to die. Death by burning.

...Now I want barbeque. Damn.

'_Burning, huh...?'_ The kid's voice mused. _'I'll have to keep that in mind...'_

...Shit, I shouldn't have thought that. Wrath's gonna _kill_ me.

'_The Fuhrer's a homunculus...'_ I felt him scowl. _'Letting that thing run this country... it's disgusting.'_

I didn't have a reply to that, so I just shrugged in response. I let the breeze ruffle my blond hair, unfazed by the way the strands whipped at my cheekbones.

'_...I don't get it, Greed.'_ My host said after a few moments of silence. _'What's your motive? What could you _possibly_ gain by siding with that Father guy, and all the other homunculi?'_

I let a small sigh rush out of my lungs, crossed my legs together and got into a meditative position. My eyes closed, and I suddenly found myself surrounded in red and black.

It wasn't hard finding the pipsqueak among the whirling colours because of that golden blond hair, but his red coat and black get-up underneath made it a little annoying. Amber eyes were set in a fixed glare in my direction, his arms folded in front of his chest.

"I've said it many times, and I'll say it again." I told him. "I want money, power, women... I want the world!" I flashed a sharp-toothed grin at the pipsqueak's direction. "Father and the other guys? I'm siding with them 'cause they're gonna help me with my goals. They're powerful, they're aiming for the world - no, the _universe_!"

"But I thought you were Greed." Edward accused. "Greed doesn't share."

I chuckled, "No, Greed doesn't share." I agreed. "That's why when we get the world, I'll tear 'em all apart, one-by-one!"

"And what if they tear you apart first?" My host retorted.

"...Honestly, what _can_ I do? I'm _dead!_ Idiot."

Edward rolled his eyes. "Tch... Is that what you truly want, Greed?" He muttered. "Material possessions don't make you happy."

Flashes of people I haven't even met before - _blondhairfemaletattoosnake _- ah _shit_ what was happening - _threemalesbullcaninelizard_ - why were these images - _lackeysteammates__**friends**_ - fuck, _fuck_ stopstop_stop_-

"Shut up." I rasped out in the real world, and I opened my eyes. The top of buildings, ant-sized people, and the line where the land met the blue sky and the clouds was what greeted me. My heart was thrumming so fast, and each throb felt like a hard jab to the chest. I tried to get my breathing even as I wiped a droplet of sweat trailing down the side of my neck.

"Greed,"

"...Yeah?" I managed as I glanced behind me. I felt Edward frown inside as I met Bradley's stern gaze.

"Father wishes to see you." Wrath replied. "Is something the matter?"

An easy smirk made its way onto my face, "Just talkin' to the pipsqueak." I stretched like a cat and did a backflip, landing smoothly onto the concrete behind me. I turned on my heel and followed the elder homunculus' lead as we walked back inside the building.

"He's not bothering you too much, is he?" The Fuhrer continued.

"What can he do?" A grin, "I'm totally in control."

'_Liar...'_ Edward whispered before he disappeared back inside. I gritted my teeth as I was reminded of what just happened mere moments ago.

Who were those people?


	3. Major Mustang II

_...I couldn't resist; I needed to write more on this idea. The plot bunnies are rampaging in my head._

**_Drabble 3: Role Reversal II (extension of Ch.1)_**

__In which Roy is the newest State Alchemist on the block, and he was assigned under Edward's (The Fullmetal Alchemist and youngest State Alchemist ever) command.__

_Major Mustang meets Colonel Elric's younger brother during a 'mission' to the library._

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><p>This just wasn't Major Mustang's day.<p>

'_Stupid pipsqueak Colonel,'_ The Flame Alchemist thought sourly as he stared at the literal _tower_ of books stacked on top of one of the tables of the library. _'I can't believe I have to clean after that kid's mess!'_

The thought of using his gloves to burn the books away from his sight flashed in his head for a moment, but he quickly dismissed the idea. The librarians would be furious with him, especially Sheska should she hear about it.

Roy had met the bookish brunette on an errand for Colonel Elric, suffocating under piles of various books in her own home. After saving her, he told her that Elric wanted all the books written by some man named Dr. Tim Marcoh. Sheska didn't have the copies, unfortunately; they had all perished in the fire. But her photographic memory helped reproduce the contents of the books, much to everyone's relief.

In the end, Colonel Elric got the books he wanted. Roy wondered why his commanding officer wanted _cookbooks_, of all things...

Sheska also got herself a job in the military because of her perfect memory and she's now working under Roy's old friend, Lieutenant Colonel Maes Hughes, reproducing the various records lost in the library fire.

Roy hoped that Maes hadn't drowned Sheska in a sea of his daughter's photos yet. Elicia was definitely an adorable little girl, but for God's sake Maes was _obsessed_.

Roy cursed under his breath as he received a paper cut from one of the heavy tomes. He glanced at the thin red line of blood on his finger before placing it in his mouth and sucking lightly.

'_Stupid Fullmetal and his stupid bibliophilic tendencies...'_

"Um, excuse me?"

"Gah!" Roy whirled around and came face-to-face - well actually it was more face-to-chest - with a large figure in a suit of armour. Unfortunately, the result of his action made his shoulder bump into a tower of books stacked precariously behind him. Roy and the large armoured man looked up in panic as the tower started to fall apart down towards them.

"W-Watch out, sir!" Roy has shoved to the side just as the books fell down onto the carpet and the armour. Different sounding thumps echoed throughout the place, and Roy winced as the distinct sound of hardback books colliding with the suit of armour assaulted his eardrums.

"Oh crap," The Major muttered. He picked up the helmet that rolled by his side and ran towards the hulking figure buried under all the tomes. "Are you alright?"

"...I'm fine!" Came the muffled tinny response, and the Flame Alchemist was surprised at how _young_ the man sounded. The armoured man slowly lifted himself from under the books.

Roy held out the helmet, "I've got your... helm...et..." He trailed off as he saw that _this guy had no head_.

"Oh, um, th-thank you." The stranger stammered in response - _how was he talking without a mouth?_ - and accepted the helmet from Roy's hands. As the suit of armour leaned forward to put the helmet on, the State Alchemist noticed something inside the body, attached to the back.

A blood seal.

Roy had only read about theories on how a blood seal is made and what it does, but he never really saw one that actually _worked_. It obviously wasn't a common thing to see, anyway, since it was counted as...

"Human transmutation," Roy couldn't help but blurt out. The taller figure seemed to panic, nearly dropping his helmet in the process.

"Oh no! N-No one was supposed to find out!" He wailed and jammed his head back on, red light coming from the eye holes. "Br-Brother is going to _kill_ me...!"

Oh no... Was he going to cry? He despised dealing with crying children... "I won't tell!" Roy quickly assured the soul - a young boy's soul, at that - trapped in the armour. "Just calm down. Please." He added for good measure.

And just like an innocent child, he calmed down. "Really?" And the way he just said that made Roy undeniably sure that this soul was still quite young. A child's soul attached to an intimidating inanimate object.

"You have my word." Major Mustang nodded.

"...Thank you," The stranger said in a sincere voice, and they were suddenly basked in an awkward silence. Roy cleared his throat and started picking up the fallen books, and the armour quickly followed suit.

"S-Sorry for startling you, sir." The young soul apologised.

"No harm done." Roy replied in a casual manner. "It's a good thing you push me out of the way. I'm sure that one of those heavy books could've cracked my head open." He scowled. "Damn Colonel Shorty... This wouldn't have had happened if he had just cleaned up after himself..."

His companion chuckled, "Well, that's Brother for you."

"...Brother?"

The suit of armour froze, "Ah, umm... Heh," Roy was certain that if the soul had a body of his own, he would be sweating bullets right now. "Yeah... Edward's my older brother... Um, I'm Alphonse. Alphonse Elric. Call me Al."

And then all the pieces fell into place. Roy felt his mind whirl with all the possible implications of the evidence presented in front of him. Colonel Elric had an automail arm and leg, his younger brother was attached to a suit of armour with a _blood seal_, a type of human transmutation and a very difficult feat in itself... only a genius could accomplish that... and Elric was a prodigy amongst alchemists and that he didn't even need an _array_ to transmute... The young alchemist was also very touchy on the subject of _how_ he lost his limbs...

"Both you and Colonel Elric attempted human transmutation." Roy realised quietly, and Alphonse let out a tiny noise of distress. To the armour's great relief he found that the only ones around were him and the Major. "Something happened, and it resulted in Fullmetal losing his limbs and you losing your body..."

Alphonse sighed, "Wow... You're pretty smart." He mumbled, not bothering to deny it.

"So it's true...!" Mustang stifled a startled gasp. "And no one knows about it?"

"No one else from the military knows." Al corrected. He continued picking up the numerous library books littered around them. "The only people who know are people we can trust..." Glowing red eyes glanced meaningfully at the Major. "Are you trustworthy, Mr...? Um, huh... I never got your name."

"Major Roy Mustang." The man introduced. "I'm the Flame Alchemist, and your brother is my commanding officer." He flashed what he hoped to be a reassuring smile at him, "And don't worry, your secret is safe with me."

If Alphonse still had a face he would be blinding the older man with a megawatt smile. "Oh! Thank you, Mr. Mustang, sir!" He cried. How trusting _was_ this kid? Roy thought idly. "You're so nice! Brother mentioned a State Alchemist under his command that was pretty mean, but you seem to be really, _really_ kind if you're willing to keep our secret."

The innocence and pure _sweetness_ this soul radiated almost made Roy feel sick to his stomach, but at the same time he couldn't help but like the boy. Alphonse was a very different personality compared to Colonel Elric. It was quite refreshing, talking to someone so pleasant.

Al bowed his head, "Um... Should I tell Brother that _you_ know about... our incident?" He whispered.

Roy patted the suit of armour right on the chest plate in reassurance, making red eyes meet his dark ones. "I'll tell him when the time is right. I'm still in shock about what I've just discovered." He scoffed and plucked another book off the carpet, "Knowing Fullmetal, he's going to get all defensive and hate me even more."

"I'll go with you." Alphonse offered. "He'll be calmer if I'm around..." He paused, and he seemed to look thoughtful for a moment. "And, honestly... I don't think Brother hates you, sir."

"...I'm sorry?" Major Mustang blinked. Did... he hear that right?

Alphonse let out a small laugh and placed a tall stack of books onto the table. "Ed is incapable of hating. He's too compassionate for that." His gaze lowered in a slightly tender fashion. "He may say that he hates you, but I've heard it in his voice. When Brother talks about the members of his team, judging from his tone of voice he holds them in high regards - especially you, Mr. Mustang,"

He turned to the bemused Major. "When Ed talks about you... Yes, there's annoyance and derisiveness in his voice, but under all of that I can see he respects you. It might be respect for your alchemy or something else, but I know that look in Brother's eyes when I see it."

Roy stared at Alphonse for a few seconds, wondering where in the _hell_ that came from, before laughing lowly and shaking his head.

"...I believe you, Alphonse." He replied. "You know Colonel Elric better than me, after all."

Alphonse chuckled, and the two of them resumed cleaning up. Roy's head was still working overtime with all the information jammed into his head during this simple visit to the library. Human transmutation, the fate of the Elric brothers, and the fact that Colonel Elric actually _respected_ him... Roy grudgingly admitted to himself that he respected the pipsqueak back, even if the blond was a pain-in-the-ass slave driver.

'_At least I know that Elric won't be firing me anytime soon...'_ Mustang thought in amusement. He and Alphonse continued working in a comfortable silence, and in no time they finished picking up all the books off the floor.

Alphonse sighed, "This is just like Brother... so absorbed in his work that he fails to be considerate towards others."

"Except you," Roy commented.

"Except me," Al laughed. "I apologise on behalf of my brother that he is making you clean up the mess he made."

Roy flashed him a small smirk in response. "Do you know what he's working on?" He asked.

The suit of armour looked hesitant, but answered anyway. "We're looking for a way to restore our bodies back." Alphonse murmured. "Those 'cookbooks' by Tim Marcoh... They're actually a wealth of information disguised in code. We've been working day and night trying to decipher them." He looked down. "I hope that we don't arrive at a dead end."

Major Mustang put a hand on the young soul's arm, making him turn his red gaze onto the older man. "If there's anything I can do to help, just ask."

"...Thank you." Alphonse replied in appreciation. He turned back to the stacks of books on the table and sighed. "Well, let me help you put these all back to their respective shelves. It's the least I can do after almost burying you under those heavy books."

Roy picked up a stack and Al followed suit, picking up two stacks instead of one. "I appreciate the help, Alphonse."

Again, they were basking in a relatively pleasant silence. The two alchemists walked side-by-side, placing books in their right order as they passed the various shelves. Today, Roy had made a new friend, and he couldn't help the small smile appearing on his face at the thought.

He only had a few close friends, and Alphonse had the likely potential of being one, too. Maes and Riza were always busy with work, but Al had a lot of free time on his hands. The young soul, like his brother, seemed to be a prodigy, too. Roy would be looking forward to the possibility of refreshingly intelligent conversations in the near future.

"So," Roy began conversationally. "What _did_ Colonel Elric tell you about me?"


	4. Fullmetal Female

_I actually planned on submitting another prompt other than this one, but it's not done. _

_Expect the next one after this, or the one after the next, to be quite large in size._

**_o0o_**

_Okay, now; another one, and this time it's a not-so-original idea._

_But I couldn't help myself. I just needed to write._

_It's probably quite rushed. I did just finish this at 11:30PM at night._

**_Drabble 4: Gender bender_**

_Edward has being hiding the fact that he is actually a she._

**_Warning(s) (?): innocent!Alphonse; Hughes knowing about the Elrics' human transmutation incident. (A hint of RoyxFem!Ed, if you want to interpret it that way)_**

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><p>"-and she is just <em>so cute<em> in this dress! Look!"

Colonel Mustang suddenly found himself with even more photos of little Elicia Hughes shoved into his face. His hand slowly retreated into the pocket of his military-issued pants, the tips of his fingers brushing against his trademark gloves.

"Gracia made that dress for her! Isn't it adorable~?" Mustang could practically _hear_ the little heart at the end of his companion's sentence. "The green polka dots really bring out her eyes, and the bow tied at the back just makes her look like a princess out of a fairytale book!"

Roy had finally had enough, "Hughes!" He snapped - both verbally and with his now-gloved hand. "I have had _enough!_"

Lieutenant Colonel Maes Hughes let out a shocked cry and clutched his precious photos to his chest as a small ball of flame threatened to turn them into ashes. He sent a dark glare at his old friend, who merely raised his hand in front of him, ready to attack again.

"Put those away, or I'll burn you along with them."

"..." If Maes wasn't a man he would pout - but he did pout, anyway. He carefully organised the photos and placed them in his wallet. "You're a heartless bastard, Roy Mustang. What would Elicia think if she knew? Her uncle Roy doesn't like her!"

Roy rubbed his forehead, trying to ward off the potential headache coming up. "I like Elicia just fine, Maes." He replied in an exasperated voice. "I just don't like it when you shove those photos in my face!"

"But that's _exactly_ why I do that- um," Maes started sweating under the very frightening glare Colonel Mustang was currently giving him. "Ah ha, ha... Um..."

"_**Hughes..."**_

"Ah... Now, c-calm down, Roy... We're in a hospital!"

Roy, much to the Lieutenant Colonel's immense relief, did so in a reluctant manner, but that death glare was still there. Maes let out an almost inaudible sigh, silently thanking whoever was up there that he wasn't going to be barbequed anytime soon.

Colonel Mustang lowered his hand back to his side, still keeping the glove on just in case, and continued walking down the relatively empty hallway of the hospital. He spotted the hulking figure of Alphonse Elric, sitting down on the down with his back to the wall outside the hospital room they were looking for. The soul in the suit of armour looked up as the two men approached, and nodded in greeting.

"Good afternoon, sirs." Alphonse, the ever-so-polite gentle giant, greeted with his metallic-sounding voice.

"Hey, Al," Maes grinned, bent down and clapped the armour on the arm. "We're here to see Ed."

"Uh, Brother...?" The armour shifted slightly closer towards the door. "Um, he's... not done. He's getting a check-up."

Roy and Maes exchanged dubious glances. No matter how much the young Elric tried, he couldn't lie to people he knew and liked.

"There's no need to lie, Alphonse." Lieutenant Colonel Hughes admonished gently. "Now, why won't Ed take any visitors? Did you two have a fight?"

Al slowly shook his head side-to-side. "No... He's just changing." The two adults knew that the young alchemist wasn't lying this time.

Roy raised an eyebrow, "Why'd you lie about that, then? If he's changing, then you should've just said so." He stated logically. The man paused, as if realising something. He chuckled and shook his head.

"...What?" Maes asked his friend warily.

"Oh, I get it." Roy chortled, suddenly looking terribly amused. "Ed's _busy_ in there, isn't he?"

Brief silence.

"...Huh?" Alphonse's red glowing gaze blinked in an innocent manner.

"Roy!" Maes hissed and punched his friend in the arm. "I don't think it's _that_, you pervert. Ignore him, Al. He's being an idiot."

"...Um, okay?" His helmet tilted to the side, reflecting his complete and utter bemusement of the situation.

Maes grabbed Roy's arm and turned them away from Alphonse. "Roy, why would he know what you were talking about?" He muttered lowly. "He's fourteen!"

"And every fourteen year old male _should_ know what I'm talking about." Roy replied.

"But you're talking about a fourteen year old soul without a body - _without hormones_. Mentally, he's still nine years old. And knowing Ed, Al's mind is still as innocent as it was back then."

Roy rolled his eyes, but he understood. Maes nodded and they turned back to the suit of armour.

"Sorry about that," Maes smiled.

"It's okay." Alphonse shrugged.

Roy stared at the door Alphonse was 'guarding'. "I'm going in." He decided and put a hand on the handle.

"B-But he may be indecent, sir-!"

"This is important business, Alphonse. Fullmetal will need to hear this. And for goodness sake, it shouldn't take him this long to get changed." With that, Colonel Mustang opened the door, despite Alphonse's protests.

But the room was empty. The hospital bed had obviously been used - the sheets were rumpled, and Edward's clothes were laid on there - more specifically his red coat, black jacket and pants. His boots were caked with mud, and were placed next to the bedside table.

The window was shut tight; Edward definitely didn't sneak out. The thought of the blond sneaking out in a hospital gown was hilarious, and the Colonel quickly dismissed that imagery before he started laughing out loud. Dark eyes scanned the area.

"...Fullmetal?" Roy called, entering the room with Maes and Al trailing behind him. Maes perked up and turned towards another door within the room, hearing the telltale sounds of water hitting tiles.

"He's in the shower." The Lieutenant Colonel stated. Alphonse visibly sagged with relief.

But that relief didn't last long. The squeaking of a tap turning gained their attention, and the sounds of water eventually slowed down to a complete stop. They could all hear the distinct _drip, drip_ of stray droplets hitting the tiles, and the clank of Ed's automail foot.

"_Al? Is that you?"_

Roy raised his brows at how _odd_ Edward sounded just then. Maes blinked and frowned.

"Did he catch a cold?" Fatherly instincts took over and his voice was tinted with concern. "His voice sounds awfully high-pitched."

"N-No... I don't think that's it..." Alphonse uttered wearily. But before he could warn Edward _not to open the bathroom door_, the inevitable happened. Steam billowed out of the bathroom, and the light coming through the dense fog outlined the form of a teenager as he walked out of the bathroom.

Roy froze, as did Maes and Al, at the sight that greeted them.

'_Full...metal?'_

The teenager in front of them was _definitely not a male_. Slightly hourglass-shaped curves were clearly outlined by the towel wrapped around her body, long clean legs decorated with various water droplets from her recent shower - the left calf made of automail.

Long golden blond hair let loose from its usual braid, dripping wet with some loose strands plastered on her cheeks, forehead, shoulders and collarbone. Roy eyed the slight swell of her breasts under the towel for a moment before averting his eyes hastily.

No, no, no; he was _not_ checking out his subordinate! His _underaged_ subordinate - now that was just _inappropriate_. Wait; was this girl even his subordinate? Was this girl really even _Fullmetal?_ Roy knew the answer to that, and whether he liked it or not the answer was a definitive, glaring, all-in-capital-letters **'YES'**.

This brings them back to the inevitable question...

"You're a _girl?_" Colonel Mustang exclaimed, taking a step back in shock.

Edward - if that is _her_ real name - stared at the males in her hospital room with wide, blank amber eyes, before letting out a high-pitched and indignant shriek.

"_What the fuck?"_ She yowled and clutched at the hem of her towel. "Al! I thought you were guarding the door!"

"I'm sorry, Ed!" Alphonse wailed. "Th-They wouldn't take no for an answer..."

"Out!" Ed ordered, waving an automail fist at them threateningly. "_Out!_ Let me get changed! _OUT!_"

"I expect a _complete explanation_ of this, Fullmetal-" Roy tried to begin, but Maes grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the room in a rough manner, Al following dutifully behind.

* * *

><p>As the door shut behind the trio they were left with an awkward silence.<p>

"...Ed's a girl." Roy repeated, attempting to fully grasp the situation.

His mind could not wrap around the fact that the _bane_ of his existence was a girl - a female, a _woman_. He did not _argue_ with women, he did not _insult _women - this went against how he was brought up. Roy was taught to be a gentleman, dammit!

"...Um, yeah..." Alphonse uttered in response, looking quite lost and unsure of what to do next.

Roy rubbed his temple, feeling a headache coming on. His dark eyes glanced at his old friend, wondering how he was reacting to all this.

With some incredulousness and amusement, Roy noticed that Maes was taking this pretty well. No surprise there, the alchemist thought, Hughes just went with the flow most of the time.

...This made it quite irritating for Roy at how _casual_ the bespectacled man was being. Sometimes he envied how Maes could do that **(1)**.

"So!" Maes chirped, clapping his hands. "I'm gonna get lunch for us. Who's up for grilled chicken sandwiches?"

Roy sighed. Maybe he was being _too_ casual about all this.

* * *

><p><strong>(1)<strong> - _OH SHI- _

_...This little piece of irony was entirely unintentional. Really._


	5. Ed: Soldier In Ishval I

_I'm splitting this one up. I have no idea how long this one will be, to be honest, but it will probably be two parts with an approximate total of 4000 words or more._

_...This is just an excuse to put Edward in the military uniform. /shameless_

_**o0o**_

_**o0o**_

_**POSSIBLE SPOILERS ON WHAT HAPPENED DURING THE ISHVALAN EXTERMINATION EVENT. BASED ON MANGA/BROTHERHOOD**_

_**o0o**_

_**o0o**_

_**Drabble 5: Soldier!Ed in Ishval**_

_Everyone had their own reasons for fighting against the rebels. But for the Elric brothers it was because it was in their nature to help... and to keep a promise to one Winry Rockbell._

_**NOTE: Obviously, Ed and Al are older. They're around nineteen and eighteen, respectively, in this time period.**_

_***Ed doesn't show up in this part yet. I still have to write it up.**_

* * *

><p>"So... this is Ishval."<p>

Dark forest green eyes scanned the barren desert area behind rectangular spectacles, their gaze stopping at the primitive-looking city in the near distance. The many buildings of the city almost matched the vast desert surrounding it.

"Captain!"

Captain Maes Hughes tore his passive gaze away from their target to address one of the soldiers under his command. "At ease, Private; what is it?"

The soldier lowered his salute, "We've replaced the flat tire on one of our trucks. We're ready to resume our journey to base camp."

Maes nodded, "Very well. Assemble the other soldiers back into the trucks and let's move out."

"Sir!" The soldier saluted again and ran off towards the others. Maes let a rueful sigh escape his lips. Most of these soldiers were fresh out of the military, and most likely haven't killed before. This will be a difficult time for all of them, but they need to push past the horrors of war for their own sanity - and most importantly, their own country.

It was times like this that made Maes wonder why he joined the military in the first place.

'_Honestly, I would rather be with Gracia right now...'_ The thought of his sweetheart waiting for him back at home made his heart skip a beat and a gentle smile appear on his face. _'But I need to do this... because the country comes first, whether I like it or not.'_

It was for a good cause, the Captain reassured himself. If the threat of Ishvalan rebels were eliminated then Amestris would be safe, and if Amestris is safe then Gracia is safe.

...That was the simple logic, anyway. It didn't take into account the many lives already, or about to be lost on this gruesome war. The hand in his pocket shifted, his callused fingers lightly trailing the fine edge of a photo.

"Captain, we're moving out!"

Captain Hughes turned and flashed a small smirk at the soldier that called him over. There was no time to be reflecting - they could all do that once this was all over. He would fight for his country, his friends, his family...

"For Gracia," Maes promised, and started walking towards the convoy.

* * *

><p>"Damn, it's so <em>hot<em>!"

"Suck it up, Kimblee." Colonel Basque Grand, the Iron Blood Alchemist, snarled as he walked past his fellow State Alchemist. "We've got a job to do."

Major Solf J. Kimblee scoffed at Grand's back but resumed walking behind him, whilst shedding his blue military jacket and slinging it over his shoulder. Flanking either side of him were Majors Giolio Comanche and Isaac McDougal, the Silver and Freezing Alchemists respectively. The two of them walked in relative silence, too absorbed in their own thoughts to attempt making conversation.

At the very tail-end of the party were a trio of State Alchemists conversing quietly with each other. The most noticeable one was about as tall has Grand but more buff, almost totally bald except for an odd tuft of curled blond hair, striking bright blue eyes and a stern expression on his face. His military jacket was off due to the heat, and he was left clad in a white button-up shirt that looked like one wrong movement could tear its seams apart, blue military-issued pants and leather combat boots.

"Dr. Marcoh," The Strong Arm Alchemist, Major Alex Louis Armstrong, began quietly. "What brings you here to the frontlines? If I'm not mistaken, your alchemy isn't suited for fighting."

Dr. Tim Marcoh, the Crystal Alchemist, chuckled wearily in response. He was the oldest alchemist there, with greying black hair and signs of aging on his face. He wore a dusty white lab coat over a simple white button-up shirt and tan slacks, with worn-out boots on his feet.

"I'm a doctor, Alex." Marcoh spoke in a friendly manner. "So I'll be in the background healing whoever I can."

"An admirable profession, especially in times like this." Major Roy Mustang, the Flame Alchemist, commented. He was a young man, looking to be possibly part-Xingese, with jet black hair casually unkempt and brushing over his forehead and slanted dark eyes. He wore the full military uniform, despite the heat, and a white coat over it to blend in with the desert background.

Alex let out a booming laugh, "Yes, yes. I definitely agree, Major Mustang."

Marcoh turned his gaze towards Roy, "I guess you could say that..." He mused vaguely. His black eyes remained trained on the younger alchemist, his expression turning from amused to incredulous. "How are you _not_ overheating, Mustang?"

"Hm?" The rookie State Alchemist blinked. "What are you talking about?"

"You have three layers of clothing - _three_ - on you in this high temperature?" The doctor rubbed his forehead. "You're going to give yourself heat stroke."

"...Really?" Roy inquired in a bemused tone. "I actually feel fine."

Marcoh opened his mouth to say something else, but he snapped it shut and shook his head in resignation. "Figures... The Flame Alchemist can obviously stand the heat."

"Damn straight." Roy grinned playfully, making the elder man grin in return.

"Well, you all look happy." The familiar voice sent the Flame Alchemist's thoughts reeling to a sudden halt. "That's good... Enjoy it while it lasts."

Roy whirled around and stared in dumbfounded surprise at his old friend, Maes Hughes. He didn't change much, the alchemist thought absently. His hair was as spiky as always, that ever-present mischievous smirk on his rectangular-shaped face. He also donned the military uniform in full, and had a matching desert camouflage coat to Roy's.

Maes also looked surprised to see him, "Roy!" He cried jovially and launched himself onto his buddy, trapping the alchemist in a suffocating bear hug. "I haven't seen you in _ages!_ How've you been? I can't believe you're here!"

Roy managed to choke out one word, _"Air."_

"Oops," Maes quickly let go and stepped back, grinning sheepishly at him. "Sorry 'bout that. Wow, I didn't recognise you at first because it's been so long!" Roy suddenly found himself under scrutiny, and he shifted slightly. "Huh... No wonder; have you gotten fatter?"

"Maes!" Roy growled and stepped forward, arms in front of him ready to strangle his fellow soldier.

"Aww, did I hit a nerve? Ow! I'm kidding, I'm kidding!" The Captain laughed and dodged another swipe aimed at his head. "But it is great to see you again."

Roy folded his arms and smiled genuinely, "Likewise." He turned back to the two State Alchemists, "You two go on without me. I've got some catching up to do."

Alex nodded, and he and Dr. Marcoh continued walking through the base camp chatting amiably.

"So!" Maes chirped as he and Roy veered off into another path, one leading towards the medical tents. "Guess what: I got myself a _sweetheart_~!"

Roy suddenly felt like doom was looming above his head as Maes continued listing Gracia's finer points.

* * *

><p>"So, enough about me..." As that sentence was uttered Roy inwardly sighed in immense relief. Good god; he forgot that if Maes was really into something, he just <em>wouldn't shut up about it<em>. "How've you been? What's been going on in your life so far, Roy?"

Instead of speaking first, Roy pulled out a silver pocketwatch and showed it to Maes. The metal gleamed in the light, "I became a State Alchemist - the Flame Alchemist." He declared proudly.

"Nice!" Hughes clapped his buddy on the shoulder, "You've really done something for yourself, huh? Man, I can't wait to see your alchemy in action..." He trailed off and his mood suddenly turned somber. "But... you'll be using that power to... so I guess that I shouldn't be so excited about it."

Mustang frowned and pocketed the silver object. "I can show you, if you want." He offered. "I'll just set off an explosion in empty space. It's exhilarating to watch."

Maes' mood turned a complete 180 and he flashed a knowing grin at Roy, "You were always such a pyromaniac." The Captain poked his friend on the arm. "I remember when you had kitchen duty at the academy back then. You almost set several people on fire just because you turned the flames up way too high."

The alchemist sniffed and crossed his arms, refusing to speak. Maes just laughed at the slightly embarrassed expression on Roy's face.

"Captain Hughes?"

"Hm? Oh, hey Al." The two men turned to a young man, looking fresh out of his teenage years. He had short golden blond hair and gentle amber eyes. He wore a simple blue-and-grey chequered button-up, brown slacks and walking boots. A white coat was draped over his shoulders, a red cross decorating the coat's breast pocket, indicating that he was a medic.

"Have you seen Brother?" The young medic, Al, asked in a polite voice.

"Ed? No; can't say I have." Hughes scratched the back of his head. "But he's 'round here somewhere. I hardly see him more than a few feet away from you."

Al grinned knowingly. "That's true. He's too overprotective for his own good."

"Hear, hear! Oh, and also I want you to meet an old friend of mine." Maes clapped Roy on the shoulder, "This is Major Roy Mustang, a State Alchemist. Roy, this is Alphonse Elric. He'll be an on-field medic since he's quite skilled in Xingese alkahestry."

Alphonse bowed his head slightly, "Nice to meet you, sir."

Roy looked intrigued, "Alkahestry, hm...?" Now there's a rare art in Amestris. Alkahestry was like alchemy, only it used a different type of energy, and it specialised in medicinal purposes rather than combat. He's never actually seen alkahestry in action before, and he was quite eager to see the healing process with his own eyes.

"That's right." The medic let a soft smile appear on his lips. "I travelled to Xing two years ago and studied alkahestry, with an old friend of mine as my teacher. She is excellent when it came to healing and combat through alkahestry."

"Combat through alkahestry..." The Captain repeated, gripping his chin in thought. "Now _that's_ an interesting concept."

The young man chuckled, "I can't show you, since she only taught me healing." He stated apologetically. "But to sum it up: her combat alkahestry revolves around explosions."

'_...Explosions, huh?'_ Roy thought. _'Who knows what would happen if she and Kimblee ever meet?'_

Alphonse looked around, a slight frown forming on his lips. The expression didn't suit the young alkahestrist; his face looked like it was made for smiles and laughter, not worry - which led to the inevitable question...

"What's a young man like you doing on the battlefield like this?" Roy inquired. "You look like you should be starting university."

The blond shrugged in response, an odd look in his amber eyes. He looked... sad, for a lack of a better word. "I am supposed to be studying, but honestly I find that saving the futures of others is better than planning for my own." He smiled. "Both of us are like that - my brother and I - we live to help."

Al's smile turned a little bitter, "Although, when Ed found out that I was going to a warzone... let's just say he was unhappy with the idea." A low chuckle escaped his lips. "It's understandable. All we have is each other." His amber eyes blinked, widened, and suddenly looked sheepish. "Oh dear, I seemed to have taken this conversation down to a somber route... I apologise."

"No, it's alright." Maes clapped him on the shoulder. "It feels good to talk about your troubles every once in a while, especially in a place like this. Otherwise you'll just... implode."

Silence.

"...Implode?" Roy parroted with a deadpan expression on his face.

"Shut up, Roy." Captain Hughes countered in a cheerful manner. Alphonse laughed; the tension in the air lessened, and in turn the mood brightened up again.

"Thank you, Captain."

"There will be none of that, Alphonse." Maes wagged a finger. "No calling me Captain when it's just us friends around. Just Maes will do. Honestly, I hate formalities."

The medic still had that gentle smile on his face, but his eyes reflected surprise. "Thank you... Maes." He complied, looking thoughtful. "Friends, huh...?"

Hughes flashed a grin at him, and Roy shrugged in a casual manner. "Yep! We're all friends here, and it's good to have friends around." The former stated in a matter-of-fact voice. "Should you ever feel down you can always turn to us, and we'll pick you back up when you fall down."

The Flame Alchemist stared at Maes incredulously, and visibly rolled his eyes at how utterly ridiculous and downright _cheesy_ that sounded coming from his mouth. The Captain pointedly ignored him.

"Well," Al began after a few moments of silence. "It's almost time for me to attend a small meeting with the other medical personnel." He glanced back at a large tent, labelled 'M-1', surrounded by smaller ones. "If you see Brother, tell him I'll be around the medical tents."

"Will do." Maes nodded. "Ed looks like you only with longer hair, a little buffer and shorter, right?"

Alphonse couldn't help the wide grin appearing on his face, "If he heard you say that last part he wouldn't hesitate to shoot you." He laughed.

* * *

><p><em>Part 2 will be up... whenever I feel like it. c:<em>

_The next one will probably be based on Post!Conqueror of Shamballa. Just warning you if you dislike spoilers._


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